CRUSH.

First love is unforgettable, I agree but first crush? Not really.

Falling for someone is like flipping a coin. You can analyze the probability but not be sure. It might seem like a piece of cake, but it's way more complex. Let's face it, who doesn't want love? But let me tell you two stories about love and crush.

There was once a guy I liked, so much. I tried hard to make him fall in love with me and he eventually did. Things were fine at first, I was madly in love, but he? Not really. What did I end up with? A broken heart that was difficult to mend.

Sometimes, it's better to not have love than to hate yourself later.

The second story is about a guy I know, and how much he adores this one girl. Though he is serious, she doesn't like him back. It's a sad story like the wrong side of the coin. What did he get? A minor heartbreak, way too slight than mine.

The question is, why do we fall for someone at first? Merely because of their looks right? So why can't we undo it as easily? Because it's NOT easy, it's NEVER easy.

Many get the right side of the coin, but what about those who don't? Who will talk about them? The constant need to hide being rejected or ghosted is real. It's not just a man, but a woman too who has to deal with this.

As much as I fancy having a crush, it comes with emotional baggage that depends on his replies.

Honestly, I have been having way too many breakdowns in the past few weeks than the past year simply because of having a crush.

But I would rather get the wrong side of the coin and be rejected than force a relationship and be miserable later. What matters most is ME and only ME. I wouldn't trade my peace for someone I like from the outside because even though they might not feel the same, I know I'm the best version of myself and nobody can advise otherwise. It's okay to fall for someone, It's okay to try but letting someone control you and your habits would be a shame. There is a time to let go, and in your heart, you know when it occurs. Whatever the reason might be, acceptance is bliss so just let it be!

Until next time :)